Dear God

Im angry as you know another month of disappointment about Emmagrace. Father why cant you bless me with her? I know david doesnt feel the same way about having another baby but carry another life becoming a mommy to Emmagrace is a true desire of my mine. father you know my heart you said you knew me even before I was concevied so that means you know Emmagrace and you know how much I would love and care for her. God you said Test you, And I have I think my faith has been was more than a mustard seed and I have asked but only recived disappointment month after month and lots of tears. If it is not your will for me to become a mom again please take the desire away lord cause I can't take the disappointment again more so after I lean on faith in you about it like I have only NOT to have my prayers answered I still love you and belive you are Just and fair however father the pain of not becoming a mom month after month is a pain I can't bare. Lord please spare me the pain father please. I need you to hear me Lord. Thank you Jesus and I love you but if it's not only your will but desire for me to become Emmagraces mom I want to thank you in advance for her and I give her right back to you please teach me day by day how you want me to be her mom and I want to end this letter to Thank you with my whold heart for the wonderful Son Ponta you have blessed me with. I love him and I ask you to help me be a better mom to him. your are holy Lord and I love you so much thank you for your life and I ask you for this desires of mind to go away or come to life. your daughter Shanta If im out of order for anything I said please forgive me.Teach me how to talk to you in a respectful way.